Is “Resilience” the New Code Word for SEL?

Dear teachers: I don’t think that word means what you think it means.

Libs of TikTok (LoTT) published an audio recording of a professional development session for teachers on X Wednesday exposing covert plans to swap out the terms Social Emotional Learning, Critical Race Theory and Diversity, Equity & Inclusion for “Resilience” in DoD schools.

The Department of Defense Education Activity (DoDEA) is the U.S. government agency responsible for planning, directing, coordinating, and managing prekindergarten through 12th grade educational programs on behalf of the Department of Defense (DoD).

DoDEA operates 161 accredited schools in 9 districts located in 11 foreign countries, 7 states, Guam, and Puerto Rico.

The department recently held a call-in meeting with educators in which participants were encouraged to cease using the terms SEL, CRT and DEI in describing their instructional programming with the children and youth in their schools, and to use the term “Resilience” in their place.

LoTT obtained audio recording of the interaction and posted it to X on Wednesday. Listen here.

What this interaction reveals is this: Educators equate Social Emotional Learning, CRT and DEI with teaching “resilience.”

But DO these types of lessons teach resilience?

Do SEL, CRT and Social Justice lessons build resilience in kids?

Hardly.

Social Emotional Learning and Critical Social Justice or “DEI” lessons in K12 take many forms, but a common feature is a constricted perception of human identity — a model of self that when presented to kids does just the opposite of build resilience.

What the teachers on the DoDEA call don’t understand is, instruction that directs children to constrict their focus to those aspects of identity at the top of the identity pyramid (see image below) actually subverts and disrupts resilient identity formation in kids.

Psychologist Dr. Steven Stosny developed the identity pyramid to illustrate why some individuals successfully form a stable, resilient sense of self, and others don’t, causing undue distress.

No matter what name you give it, instruction which creates a “constricted” perception of identity in youth leads to tragic suffering in these individuals — suffering which only can be ameliorated by the child learning to expand his or her sense of identity to include a greater focus on the more foundational aspects.

Dr. Stosny’s understanding of the role of identity in developing a stable, resilient sense of self puts schools to shame, as they are actively harming our kids with instruction that both disrupts healthy identity formation AND fosters resentment.

On the other hand, when children are taught to identify with their basic, shared humanity — the foundational aspect of the identity pyramid — this is shown to alleviate anxiety.

Basic Humanity is a sense of connection with all humans. It increases respect, appreciation, compassion, and kindness. Identifying with basic humanity alleviates the feelings of isolation that are integral to most psychological distress. It humanizes perceptions of others and culls the negative judgments of self and others that produce so much anxiety and resentment. When in touch with our basic, shared humanity, we automatically like ourselves better and treat others humanely.

Character is also foundational to a stable identity. Character consists of mental and moral qualities (e.g.: honesty, flexibility, humility, resilience, generosity, accountability) — in addition to personality and temperament. In short, character is how we tend to think, feel, and behave.

Basic humanity, and character. Focusing on these foundational aspects of what makes us human promotes the development of a broader, richer, and more resilient sense of self.

On the other hand, a narrow identity causes heartache.

Dr. Stosny even writes that people with narrow or constricted identities suffer anxiety, rigidity, depression, and, in extreme cases, “a fragmented sense of self.”

Identifying with any of the upper rungs of the pyramid, at the expense of the foundational aspects, causes prolonged stress or dysphoria. Most of the ideological and cultural strife in the world stems from hyperfocus on any of the upper rungs while violating the foundation.

Dr. Stosny writes, “The same culture wars that have devolved public discourse into name-calling and pejorative adjectives can destabilize individual identity by making it reactive and narrow. They make us behave uncharacteristically and violate our basic humanity.”

Anxiousness, depression, and resentment are ameliorated in invoking in ourselves a sense of our basic humanity and in exercising our capacity for compassion, kindness, and appreciation. This is the recipe for achieving tolerance and respect for others, and for feeling sure about our selves and our valuable contribution to the world.

And get this: Kids who are coached to self-identify with the foundational aspects of identity become invulnerable to harsh self-judgments and any disrespectful regard by others.

In other words, with good instruction about identity, kids become anti-fragile.

Dear DoDEA: THAT’S how you teach true RESILIENCE.

Read “Identity Resilience” by Steven Stosny, PhD.

#KIDSFIRST